Matt Kohrs
News • Business • Investing & Finance
Bulls On Parade || Issue 3
“HOUSTON, WE’VE HAD A PROBLEM HERE.”
March 05, 2023
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I HATE THIS GAME!

As you can see from my plays below, I'm positioned neutral-bearish. I'm currently short a bunch of call premium, which means these back-to-back bullish days have been particularly painful for me. My reasoning for selling so much call premium is multifaceted: bearish seasonality, bearish price action since Feb 15th & hawkish economic reports. With all the being said, the kitchen is starting to get a bit hot.

The overall market has been ripping higher in the recent sessions as shown above. To make things worse, the SPY has also had some nice technical breakouts. It appears as if $408 is the next target (if $405 can hold). I will most likely have to create some defensive positions this week, but I very much hope the Unemployment Report (Friday, March 10th @ 8:30am ET) goes my way.

 


 

Seasonality Update

S&P 500 Seasonal Bias (March 6th)

  • Trades (Years Tested): 25
  • Bull Win Percentage: 44%
  • Profit Factor: 0.32
  • Bias: Bearish

Equity Curve -->


 

Current Account Value (March 5th)

$9,996.57 

Daily Realized P&L: +$114.48

YTD Realized P&L: +$570.88

 


 

Closed Position(s) +$115

NFLX $347.50/$350 CCS (5) March 17th 

  • Original Credit: $0.38/ea
  • Closed Debit: $0.15/ea
  • P&L: +$115 (+60%)

 


 

New Position(s)

None

 


 

Current Position(s)

COIN Call Credit Spread (5) March 17th

  • Sold: $72 & Bought: $77 --> Credit: $0.50/ea
  • Max Return: $50/ea & Max Risk: $250/ea
  • Current Value: $0.98/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.20/ea
  • Profit Odds: 75%


 

META Call Credit Spread (5) March 17th

  • Sold: $190 & Bought: $192.5 --> Credit: $0.33/ea
  • Max Return: $33/ea & Max Risk: $217/ea
  • Current Value: $0.82/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.15/ea
  • Profit Odds: 63%


 

SPY Call Credit Spread (3) March 17th

  • Sold: $409 & Bought: $412 --> Credit: $0.56/ea
  • Max Return: $56/ea & Max Risk: $244/ea
  • Current Value: $1.10/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.25/ea
  • Profit Odds: 63%


 

QQQ Call Credit Spread (5) March 24th

  • Sold: $313 & Bought: $315 --> Credit: $0.38/ea
  • Max Return: $38/ea & Max Risk: $162/ea
  • Current Value: $0.43/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.15/ea
  • Profit Odds: 79%


 

SPY #2 Call Credit Spread (4) March 31st

  • Sold: $415 & Bought: $417 --> Credit: $0.42/ea
  • Max Return: $42/ea & Max Risk: $158/ea
  • Current Value: $0.58/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.20/ea
  • Profit Odds: 72%


 

TSLA Call Credit Spread (3) March 31st

  • Sold: $245 & Bought: $250 --> Credit: $0.70/ea
  • Max Return: $70/ea & Max Risk: $430/ea
  • Current Value: $0.30/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.20/ea
  • Profit Odds: 92%


 

TSLA #2 Call Credit Spread (5) March 31st

  • Sold: $220 & Bought: $222.50 --> Credit: $0.37/ea
  • Max Return: $37/ea & Max Risk: $213/ea
  • Current Value: $0.48/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.15/ea
  • Profit Odds: 77%


 

SPY #3 Call Credit Spread (5) April 6th

  • Sold: $414 & Bought: $417 --> Credit: $0.55/ea
  • Max Return: $55/ea & Max Risk: $245/ea
  • Current Value: $0.98/ea
  • Profit Target: $0.20/ea
  • Profit Odds: 68%


 

My Thoughts

I have two main concerns at the current moment: META $190/$192.50 & SPY $409/$412. Zuckerberg pulled off a very impressive day to finish out the week. If META doesn't quickly revert, I'll need to transform my current position into an iron condor or a collar. This could very well still be a loss, but it would help lessen the impact.

For the SPY $409/$412 play, my fate is in the hands of the Fed speeches this week & Friday's Unemployment Report. It may not help me, but I do want to remind everyone that the first half of March is seasonally bearish. If things continue to push against me, I will use the same defensive measures as stated above with META -- I will also cry an extra amount in the shower.

As I'm review everything, there are two major ways I would critique myself. My positions are highly correlated. This is obviously nice if things are going in your favor, but it's uniquely painful if things turn against you. Moving forward I'll be attempting to lessen the correlation between all of my plays. Additionally, I want to use less of my available capital for my core positions. I'm concerned I don't have enough free capital for my defensive maneuvers because I went "too big" with the initial spreads.

Make sure to check back throughout the week to see how I defend myself from the market overlords screwing me. 

(This is why I'm not worried about my COIN play:

)

 

As always, thanks for reading! If you have any questions, comments or concerns, don't hesitate to reach out to me. Much love!

 

Notes

Max Return (Credit Spreads): The credit received when creating the position. This is achieved when you get to the expiration date and the price is below the sold contract for a Call Credit Spread and above the sold contract for a Put Credit Spread.

Max Risk (Credit Spreads): The difference between the spread's two strikes minus the credit received when the position was created.

Breakeven (Credit Spreads): The sold strike plus the credit for CCS and the strike minus the credit for PCS.

 

RISK WARNING: Trading involves HIGH RISK and YOU CAN LOSE a lot of money. Do not risk any money you cannot afford to lose. Trading is not suitable for all investors. We are not registered investment advisors. We do not provide trading or investment advice. We provide research and education through the issuance of statistical information containing no expression of opinion as to the investment merits of a particular security. Information contained herein should not be considered a solicitation to buy or sell any security or engage in a particular investment strategy. Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results. Links above include affiliate commission or referrals. I'm part of an affiliate network and I receive compensation from partnering websites. The video is accurate as of the posting date but may not be accurate in the future.

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Welcome! Read This To Get Into The Goonie Trading Discord!!!

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Everything You've Been Taught About Trading Is A LIE!
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January 04, 2026
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Hello January! || Goonie Newsletter
Goonie Newsletter (January 5th - January 9th)

Hello January!

Key Weekly Performance Stats:

  • S&P 500: -0.10%
  • Nasdaq 100: -1.26% 
  • Russel 2000: -1.15%
  • Bitcoin: +3.05%

Last week's holiday trading did what holiday trading always does — Thin volume, choppy moves, and zero conviction. Stocks drifted into year-end with the Santa rally never really showing up, then markets went dark for New Year’s Day (Thu). When trading resumed on Friday, buyers showed up selectively, with some dip-buying in cyclicals and semis, while mega-caps stayed mixed. Nothing dramatic, just the market stretching after a long year.

Data-wise, it was a light but telling week. Pending Home Sales (Mon) surprised to the upside, hinting that housing demand may be stabilizing at lower rates. Tuesday brought a cluster of updates: Case-Shiller home prices continued to cool, Chicago PMI remained in contraction but improved, and the December FOMC minutes reinforced the same message we’ve been hearing. Officials are still debating how restrictive policy really is. Friday’s final S&P Global Manufacturing PMI stayed in expansion territory, keeping the soft-landing narrative alive, even if confidence remains fragile.

Looking ahead to next week, things get real again. Monday: ISM Manufacturing PMI. Wednesday: JOLTS job openings. Thursday: weekly jobless claims plus productivity and trade data. And then Friday’s December jobs report takes center stage. With rate expectations already feeling jumpy, that payroll print could be the first real volatility trigger of the new year. As always, stick to your trading plan and respect your risk. Godspeed.

Best,

Thicc Kohrs

P.S. The official Goonie Discord is live! (FREE Access w/ code GOONIE: https://bit.ly/GoonieGroup)

 


 

Market Events

Monday, Jan 5th

10:00 AM ET    ISM Manufacturing PMI & Prices (Dec)

 

Tuesday, Jan 6th

09:45 AM ET    S&P Global Services PMI (Dec)

 

Wednesday, Jan 7th

05:00 AM ET    Eurozone CPI MoM & YoY (Dec)

08:15 AM ET    ADP Nonfarm Employment Change (Dec)

10:00 AM ET    JOLTS Job Openings (Nov)

10:00 AM ET    ISM Non-Manufacturing PMI & Prices (Dec)

 

Thursday, Jan 8th

08:30 AM ET    Initial Jobless Claims

 

Friday, Jan 9th

08:30 AM ET    Unemployment Change (Dec)

08:30 AM ET    Nonfarm Payrolls (Dec)

10:00 AM ET    Michigan Report (Jan)

 


 

Seasonality Update

S&P 500 Seasonal Bias (Monday, Jan 5th)

  • Bull Win Percentage: 64%
  • Profit Factor: 1.20
  • Bias: Neutral

Equity Curve -->

 

S&P 500 Seasonal Bias (Tuesday, Jan 6th)

  • Bull Win Percentage: 57%
  • Profit Factor: 0.86
  • Bias: Neutral

Equity Curve -->

 

S&P 500 Seasonal Bias (Wednesday, Jan 7th)

  • Bull Win Percentage: 50%
  • Profit Factor: 0.93
  • Bias: Neutral

Equity Curve -->

 

S&P 500 Seasonal Bias (Thursday, Jan 8th)

  • Bull Win Percentage: 61%
  • Profit Factor: 2.11
  • Bias: Bullish

Equity Curve -->

 

S&P 500 Seasonal Bias (Friday, Jan 9th)

  • Bull Win Percentage: 50%
  • Profit Factor: 0.56
  • Bias: Leaning Bearish

Equity Curve -->

 

Notes: These analytics are derived from the performance of the S&P 500 futures contract over the past +25 years. Additionally, results are computed from the futures market open and close.


 

Options Strategy Update

The 0 DTE signal hit 8 for 8 times (16 for 16 total units) this past week.

Signal Accuracy: ~100%

Note: These signals are posted in real-time in the Goonie Trading Discord. You can join the Goonie Discord for FREE w/ code GOONIE (Click Here!)!!!

 

Piper's Current Signal Streak: 53 Trades

December Record: 70/70 Units

January Record: 4/4 Units

 

Monday, Dec 29th

SPY Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $690 / $691) 🟢

QQQ Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $623 / $624) 🟢

 

TuesdayDec 30th

SPY Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $689 / $690) 🟢

QQQ Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $622 / $623) 🟢

 

Wednesday, Dec 31st

SPY Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $688 / $689) 🟢

QQQ Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $621 / $622) 🟢

 

Thursday, Jan 1st

No Signal Produced (Market Closed)

 

Friday, Jan 2nd

SPY Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $687 / $688) 🟢

QQQ Call Credit Spread (2x Multiple @ $623 / $624) 🟢

 


 

New Year's Resolutions Already Broken

All of them *

* This data point is from readings over the past week. The reported information should not be taken as an aggregate or cumulative value for any period beyond the most recent week (Sunday through Saturday). Appropriate alterations were made to account for both travel and time zone shifts.

 


 

Notes

RISK WARNING: Trading involves HIGH RISK and YOU CAN LOSE a lot of money. Do not risk any money you cannot afford to lose. Trading is not suitable for all investors. We are not registered investment advisors. We do not provide trading or investment advice. We provide research and education through the issuance of statistical information containing no expression of opinion as to the investment merits of a particular security. Information contained herein should not be considered a solicitation to buy or sell any security or engage in a particular investment strategy. Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results. Links above include affiliate commission or referrals. I'm part of an affiliate network and I receive compensation from partnering websites.

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Daily Degen Trade Report (+$675) || Trade With Me!!!
Thursday, January 8th

Welcome To Chop City

THICC RETURN: +$675

My posted, REAL-TIME TRADES PAID -- Today's trades would have paid for MORE THAN AN ENTIRE OF GOONIE MEMBERSHIP!

If you're curious about what I trade & how I trade, join the Goonie Trading Discord. You can be a premium member for 1 month free of charge. It's a riskless opportunity for you to become a Goonie today!

You can join the Goonie Discord for FREE w/ code GOONIE (Click Here!)

 

Piper's Picks

PIPER'S RETURN: +$0

No Signal Produced

 

Thicc Matt's Personal Trades

Trade One: 15 SPX 6,895/6,885 Put Credit SpreadsThese PCS's were sold at $0.65/ea and were bought back at $0.20/ea -- THIS MEANS MY REALIZED GAIN WAS $675!

 

Trade One Return: +$675

Total Return: +$675 (before fees)

 

These trades alone would have paid for MORE THAN AN ENTIRE YEAR OF GOONIE DISCORD ACCESS! 

You can join the Goonie Discord for FREE w/ code GOONIE (Click Here!)

 


 

Notes

RISK WARNING: Trading involves HIGH RISK and YOU CAN LOSE a lot of money. Do not risk any money you cannot afford to lose. Trading is not suitable for all investors. We are not registered investment advisors. We do not provide trading or investment advice. We provide research and education through the issuance of statistical information containing no expression of opinion as to the investment merits of a particular security. Information contained herein should not be considered a solicitation to buy or sell any security or engage in a particular investment strategy. Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results. Links above include affiliate commission or referrals. I'm part of an affiliate network and I receive compensation from partnering websites.

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January 07, 2026
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Daily Degen Trade Report (+$720) || Follow My Trades For FREE!
Wednesday, January 7th

Hump Day!

THICC RETURN: +$720

My posted, REAL-TIME TRADES PAID -- Today's trades would have paid for MORE THAN AN ENTIRE OF GOONIE MEMBERSHIP!

If you're curious about what I trade & how I trade, join the Goonie Trading Discord. You can be a premium member for 1 month free of charge. It's a riskless opportunity for you to become a Goonie today!

You can join the Goonie Discord for FREE w/ code GOONIE (Click Here!)

 

Piper's Picks

PIPER'S RETURN: -$32

A BULLISH signal, 4/5 strength, was generated around 10:30am ET by Piper. The signal was used with various advanced options strategies to score (don't worry, I'll teach you every aspect of the strategy).SPY Missed & QQQ Hit

SPY Return: -$54 per $170 signal capital requirement

QQQ Return: +$22 (+100%) per $178 signal capital requirement

Total Return: -$32 per $348 signal capital requirement

 

Thicc Matt's Personal Trades

Trade One: 20 SPX 6,915/6,905 Put Credit SpreadsThese PCS's were sold at $0.46/ea and were bought back at $0.10/ea -- THIS MEANS MY REALIZED GAIN WAS $720!

 

Trade One Return: +$720

Total Return: +$720 (before fees)

 

These trades alone would have paid for MORE THAN AN ENTIRE YEAR OF GOONIE DISCORD ACCESS! 

You can join the Goonie Discord for FREE w/ code GOONIE (Click Here!)

 


 

Notes

RISK WARNING: Trading involves HIGH RISK and YOU CAN LOSE a lot of money. Do not risk any money you cannot afford to lose. Trading is not suitable for all investors. We are not registered investment advisors. We do not provide trading or investment advice. We provide research and education through the issuance of statistical information containing no expression of opinion as to the investment merits of a particular security. Information contained herein should not be considered a solicitation to buy or sell any security or engage in a particular investment strategy. Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results. Links above include affiliate commission or referrals. I'm part of an affiliate network and I receive compensation from partnering websites.

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